How a negativity bias can be helpful
We live in a pretty strange time.
We carry inbuilt instincts and survival tactics that have served us for around 200,000 years in our current form (or a couple of million in our evolved form), which is a long time to develop some pretty solid instincts.
However, in just the last few hundred years, we’ve totally changed the game.
The inbuilt instincts that once worked perfectly for our survival often inhibit our lives today. We live in a completely different world. It’s a world full of opportunity, everything is shiny and bright, and there's this idea that everyone should be positive and there is no room for negativity, of any kind.
The truth is, thinking positive is a concept that can sometimes be a struggle. It can be seriously hard to maintain positivity in life all the time because, you know, sh*t happens.
But here’s an interesting little tidbit – it’s also hard because we are hardwired for negativity.
We are born with a ‘negativity bias’.
What this basically means is that we naturally seek out the negatives in a situation, and this can manifest in different ways.
Take the example of someone complimenting you on a job well done, but including a passing comment about something that could use some improvement. We amplify the not so great part, and almost forget the good part. Negative memories outweigh the good ones.
You walk away from a job interview that went well overall, but all you can think of is that one question where you fumbled for a moment.
You scroll through photos from a birthday party that are posted on social media. You look great in every single other photo, but the one you keep coming back to is the one where you have your eyes half closed and your mouth open awkwardly.
Something good happens, and we immediately look for something bad.
However, this bias that is interpreted as negative today, was lifesaving twenty thousand years ago.
For example, let’s say it’s twenty thousand years ago and you go for a walk by yourself.
You get to your favourite stream beside your favourite meadow, feel the sun beaming down, take in a deep breath, close your eyes and smile at the beauty of the world.
BIG mistake.
A saber-tooth tiger has been sitting in the meadow waiting for you, and then pounces! You just made a delicious afternoon snack.
Observing the beauty of nature, being present, and taking time to be grateful is something we encourage today. The concept of mindfulness is huge and it’s life changing. In this world at this time, it’s safe and beneficial to be mindful. But it will come as no surprise that it wasn’t always that way.
What you should have done in this scenario, in order to preserve your own survival, was cautiously approach the meadow constantly scanning for threats. You should have stayed on high alert, and analyzed every sound, every snap of a twig – ‘What was that?! Am I going to die right now?!’
You should have scanned for the negatives in every situation you were in, to make sure you weren’t going to be attacked, eaten, or captured.
See where I’m going with this?
We have an inherent instinct to look for the negatives, because that’s what has kept us alive for so long.
These days, most of us don’t have to worry about wild beasts, but we still search for other negatives – we’ll even make them up, just to be safe.
So instead of looking for helpful negatives (like identifying threats to our physical survival), we just fixate on any negative we can find. Then we feel guilty for being so negative, and try to force ourselves to be positive, which can sometimes make it worse.
In many cases, we probably do need to stop indulging it.
Often the negativity we feel is either imagined or unnecessary.
Not every situation has a negative aspect. Some friendships and relationships are genuinely great. Sometimes a compliment is just a compliment. And no one takes a great photo every single time.
If you feel yourself unnecessarily seeking out the negatives, one thing you can do is a kind of 'acknowledgement/thank you/move on' trick. That pretty much explains it; all you do is try to catch yourself in that thought, realize your mind is just doing it’s evolutionary job, thank it, and move on.
You don’t need to dwell on those thoughts if they don’t serve you. Take the time to really consider what the underlying message of the negative thought is and weigh up how likely it is to be true, what the consequences of buying into the belief might be, and more importantly, what the consequences of letting it go will be.
A common example of negativity bias is the belief that you are unlucky. It happens all the time in subtle ways that you may not even notice. How often do you hear someone say, ‘that’s just my luck,’ when something goes wrong? We remember our loses far more clearly than our wins.
Let that go.
You’re allowed to feel disappointed but holding onto your disappointment burns energy, taints your mood, preoccupies your mind… and it just makes you feel terrible. Allowing those emotions to wash over you and roll off your back isn’t your natural instinct yet (you’re undoing thousands of years of evolution here), but it is actually easier than holding onto them.
Another little trick is Martin Seligman’s (Professor of Psychology, University of Pennsylvania) Three Good Things exercise. It’s basically a gratitude journal – each day, write down three good things that have happened to you. It keeps the negativity bias of forgetting the positives and focusing on the negatives in check.
When we really stop to consider the good parts of each day, we regain balance. Or more accurately, we see that the good outweighs the bad more often than not. We just need to get in the practice of recognising it.
And remember, it’s not all bad. You can use your negativity bias to your advantage too.
We still need to keep ourselves physically safe (watch for wild beasts and psychopaths) and it’s our negativity bias that often helps us do this.
We also use this instinct when we run through potential risks in new opportunities. In fact, whenever you are considering what could go wrong in any situation, there’s a good chance you are accessing your negativity bias. Doing this allows you to mitigate risks and make better choices.
So, as with anything, there are good sides and bad sides to consider here. What makes all the difference, is understanding when something is actually helpful and when it is holding us back.
Shift your negativity bias to the side when you know it’s unfounded, unwarranted or unnecessary.
And always watch for saber-tooths.